Welcome back! Merry (belated) Christmas and Happy New Year!
Thank you for coming back to listen to this week’s episode of Real Talk – the show where we talk about dating, relationships, and all the lovely and horrible experiences we’ve had with them. Ranita here, Steph is probably watching Friends right now but I’m sure she says hello.
In terms of our love lives, things with Jonny ended at the end of November. We had a major disagreement about mental health. If you know me at all, you know that is something very important to me. He didn’t seem to think that it was a “real” problem so I had to cut him loose. Then I turned 20, and went home for the holidays. Nothing else eventful happened.
As for Steph, she’s moving out of her childhood home, which is making her very nostalgic. She’s currently obsessed with The Greatest Showman (which I have not seen personally, but the guys who wrote the songs from Dear Evan Hansen wrote the soundtrack so I’m sure it’s great).
In terms of our new year’s resolutions in regards to dating, Steph will probably continue on the way she’s been going. As of right now she isn’t seeing anyone. She is, however, talking to a few people. It’s possible she’ll have a date in the next couple of weeks.
As for me, I’ve decided to take a break from dating for a while. Last year was a whirlwind of craziness in terms of my dating life. I want to take a step back and figure out what exactly I want. If I do date anyone this year, I hope it’ll lead to me having a girlfriend. It’s 20gayteen after all.
Anyways, this week’s episode was about breaks up and ghosting, which kind of go hand in hand in our opinions.
We’ve noticed a crazy amount of break ups for people our age. It’s odd. Nobody’s staying together anymore. We chalk this up to swipe culture, and the idea that people are constantly moving on to the next thing. Nobody’s happy with what they have anymore. They’re always looking for something better.
My sister (s/o to Monika!) mentioned that the divorce rate is also really high, so this is multi-generational. Ghosting has been around forever. Years ago, you would run away to Paris or leave your phone off the hook to avoid someone. Now we just block people on Snapchat.
In terms of our personal lives, I’ve only been broken up with once. All the other times, I have been the one who initiated the break up. I broke up with my first boyfriend by sending him Taylor Swift lyrics (Picture to Burn & Forever and Always) over Facebook when I was 10 years old. I’ve changed a lot since then, but I’m still pretty heartless. For example, I once broke up with someone by texting her from the airport telling her it was over. When she asked if we could talk about it I told her no, because I was flying to Paris in half an hour. I like being dramatic.
Steph has never been an official relationship, so she doesn’t relate to break ups that well. She has casually seen people, and the ending of those relationships was similar to a break up. They’re much less formal, but she still finds that she’s been ghosted quite a lot…
Steph was ghosted by the boy we’re convinced was a catfish (we discussed him in a previous episode). SparkNotes version: he and Steph were meant to hang out when she went back home to Stratford. Last minute, he told her he couldn’t and that he was actually going to be moving to Thunder Bay because he might have a new job. Steph said okay and asked him to let her know. Five minutes later, he texted her telling her he got the job. Steph said bye and told him to have a nice life.
Also, the young man with the heated seats that Steph was seeing ghosted her. The day after their second date, he just stopped replying to her messages. She messaged him to say Happy Birthday a couple of days later, but then he blocked her on Snapchat and she never heard from him again. She still follows him on Instagram though (God knows why).
We also discussed these random memories we have from all these dates we’ve been on. For example, Steph was talking about how she spilled Sprite on the heated seats guy’s floor, and I was talking about how Jonny’s bottle of tequila sat right where my laptop was while we recorded this week’s episode. It’s weird to think about how the people we once liked so much were once in our houses, spilling various beverages on floors.
Overall, ghosting sucks, and we would love to avoid it. However, we think that in some situations it’s the only option. For example, as women we’ve had to deal with creepy men (like we discussed in the last episode!) who don’t get the hint, so the only way to get rid of them was to ghost. Otherwise, we advocate for being open and honest about whether or not something is working for you.
Couples of the Week
Steph’s is Colton Haynes and Jeff Leatham. Their Christmas Intagram stories were very cute apparently. I’m a big fan of Colton Haynes because I used to write fanfiction about his character on Teen Wolf. I’m happy for him and his husband, as is Steph.
My couple of the week is Logic and his wife Jess Andrea. I feel like I’ve talked about them in previous episodes. Logic just seems so blessed and so grateful to have her in his life. In one of their Instagram stories over Christmas, Jess was dancing around in her pajamas and Logic was filming and you could see him pointing and going “that’s my wife y’all!” and that’s just #relationshipgoals.
Advice Nobody Asked For
My favourite segment made a comeback! This week’s advice is in regards to boy’s opinions on your body hair (or anyone’s opinions on your body hair really). I’ve had a guy be upset that I didn’t shave for him. Then I did shave for the next time we saw each other, and he told me I “didn’t try hard enough.” Don’t put up with that kind of nonsense. If someone’s freaked out by hair, they likely can’t put up with other, more serious parts of a relationship. Get rid of them sooner rather than later.
Songs of the Week
Steph’s is This is Me from The Greatest Showman soundtrack. She loves that it’s the movie’s anthem and really sums up the idea that people are who they are and they’re unapologetic about it. I listened to the song once and it sounds like a song I would sing when coming out to my parents. Like a more Broadway-version of Born This Way is how I’d describe it.
Mine is Girls by Beatrice Eli. She sings about her 6th grade teacher, which makes me think of my 10th grade English teacher, Ms. G. All the boys had a crush on her and thought she was ridiculously attractive, and I totally agreed. I couldn’t say anything because I was deep in the closet, but I was insanely jealous when she got engaged.
That’s the rundown of this week’s show. Hopefully you enjoyed it. We’ll be back next Tuesday at 7pm. We’re not sure what next week’s topic is so tune in to find out!
Once again, thanks to Radio Laurier for giving us this awesome opportunity. We appreciate having a platform to discuss all the heartbreak and hardship we’ve experienced over the past two decades.
Lastly, if you want to get in contact with us you can tweet us @PlaidCheesecake and @stephwillmore. If you want to e-mail me you can do that at virk9200 (at) mylaurier (dot) ca. Cheers, we hope you come back next week!
Check out our Spotify playlist! I hope you enjoy it. I do.