You’ll Find Someone When You’re Not Looking – Real Talk Episode 4

You’ll Find Someone When You’re Not Looking – Real Talk Episode 4

Hi y’all! Thank you for coming back for this week’s episode of Real Talk – the show where we talk about dating, relationships, and all the lovely and horrible experiences we’ve had with them. Ranita here, as per usual. Steph says hi, most likely, she’s down the hall, I’m not getting up to ask.

This week’s show was about relationship clichés and kinks galore. What a lovely combination.

As for our love lives, I am still seeing Jonny. He’s not sick of me yet, thank God. We hung out again, got some Starbucks, went to the mall, walked around holding hands, bought a candle, I light it all the time, etc. I had a really good time if you know what I mean (just kidding… or am I?).  Steph is pissed because he’s all I talk about, and she could hear us making out at one point. Whoops. (Sorry not sorry.)

Steph will love anyone who buys her Starbucks – so all you young men, she likes Americanos. She was supposed to have a date over the weekend, but it didn’t wind up happening, which we will discuss next week.

In addition to that, we don’t understand when boys aren’t clear about their intentions. Steph was talking to a guy once who said that he “wasn’t looking for anything serious” yet two days later he changed his status to “in a relationship” on Facebook. Don’t do that. Be honest please.

We also have two podcast recommendations – Steph’s is Adult Sh*t on YouTube. Mine is Guys We F*cked on iTunes. Both are sex-positive and amazing.

Relationship Clichés

 “You’ll find someone when you’re not looking.”

Worded differently, this saying could be good. I believe that you shouldn’t be looking for someone all the time. I think if you’re doing your own thing, and you’re working on being your best self, people will naturally be attracted to you. This idea is similar, but more self-positive, rather than putting the blame on the person in question, and telling them to chill out.

“You’re too good for them.” Or “You’re too much for them.”

This is a back-handed compliment in a sense. It’s trying to encourage you that you are great, and people are just missing out on that. But it really isn’t your fault if somebody ghosts you or somebody leaves you. We think the blame should be on that person for being a jerk, rather than on us for being awesome.

“Boys don’t like clingy women.”

This is annoying. Either women are too independent or we’re too clingy. We can’t win. I give up.

Relationship Goals

Steph’s relationship goals are long-term. She wants a dog, a house, a lot of Starbucks, and a husband. She wants to do cute things, like going on hikes with said dog. Potentially have 3 children. Bake cookies, have more Starbucks. She just wants her life to be cute.

My relationship goal is much more low key. When I was on my date with Jonny (yes I’m talking about him again, fight me) we walked around the mall holding hands, and I saw Coles. Now Jonny isn’t a big reader, whereas I am. He knew I was looking at that shop with my crazy eyes, so I started pulling us towards the store, dragging him behind me. When we got inside Coles, he told me to “go explore” and let go of my hand. I don’t know why I find this so cute. It just made me feel things. I guess supporting each other’s interests is my relationship goal.


Urban Dictionary defines a kink as “sexual tastes for a person, usually an unusual taste in sexual behaviour.” Thanks Urban Dictionary, you always come in clutch.


Steph enjoys being taught what to do. As do I. We also discussed choking (love me some of that), spanking, and being tied up as a part of this power dynamic. We pretty much love it all.


We’re both for it. Steph says that not being able to see heightens your other senses. I can attest to this.

The Darn Daddy Kink

This all comes down to power, and the dominant/submissive thing. Steph doesn’t know how to feel about it. She has a friend on Tumblr who is living a lifestyle where she and her boyfriend (her “daddy”) engage in this sort of behaviour all the time, rather than just in the bedroom. Personally, I have been with someone who was into the daddy kink, but we kept it in the bedroom. I’m not into it myself, but because my partner was, I went with it.

To sum up… Do what you want. Do each other. As long as you’re not breaking the law and you’re being consensual and safe, go for it. Have fun, try new things. Just be honest with your partner, and you should be good.


Couples of the Week

Troian Bellisario and Patrick J. Adams are Steph’s couple of the week. She’s normal. Mine is Duchess and Thomas O’Malley from The Aristocats. I really like cats. Fight me.

Songs of the Week

My song of the week is Dress by Taylor Swift. I have Reputation on repeat. If I could, I would have that entire album as my song of the week. It’s just fantastic. Very relevant to my life at the current moment. I hope you enjoyed hearing me attempt to sing Dress on the show this week.

Steph’s song of the week is Big Eyes by Lana Del Rey. This song was in the movie Big Eyes. Steph heard the first two words in the song during the movie and she knew it was Lana right away. She’s such a fan.


Peace Out

 So, that’s this week’s show, we hope you enjoyed. We will be back next Tuesday at 7pm talking about catcalling and just creeps in general. That should be a fun time.

Once again, thanks to Radio Laurier for giving us this awesome opportunity. We appreciate having a platform to discuss our nonsense.

Lastly, if you want to get in contact with us you can tweet us @PlaidCheesecake and @stephwillmore. If you want to e-mail me you can do that at virk9200 (at) mylaurier (dot) ca. Cheers, we hope you come back next week!

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